So, what now?

Well, that's it for the show I was doing. It was kind of stressful, for a variety of reasons, more so than I usually like a show to be, and it was bittersweet that by the time of the performance today we'd finally found our groove as an ensemble, I felt, but that it was our last show. None the less, I made a room full of new friends, and people I hope to work with in the future, and that's always good.

But what now? Like I said in a previous post, I've done six shows in 2011. I don't think there has been a week this year where I didn't have at least one rehearsal for something, as well as numerous auditions, tech rehearsals, and performances. For a second I thought that now, finally, I'd come to the end of this run and that I didn't have any more performances scheduled on the docket. But nope! The Muse, a show I did as part of a one-act festival this January, the first show I did this year, is going to a short play competition in New York this July, which we'll start rehearsals for sometime in the next few weeks.

But starting this week, I'm free! Sort of. Not exactly. Well, no. Let me break down everything I've got going on, I'm taking a Shakespeare with Actors Shakespeare Project, which meets on Mondays usually but is happening on Tuesday this week, Wednesday I'm going out for Shakespeare Now's Romeo and Juliet, and then I have training in Kendall Square to start running a bar quiz over there, Thursday is more training, Friday I'm auditioning for a student film.

Regardless, I feel like I'm going to have a lot more time, and soon enough I won't be sure what to do with it. I can be preparing for Stagesource, that'd be a productive thing to do. I think I'd like to work on my guitar playing, I really enjoy the guitar, and I know that I'm on the verge of a breakthrough with the instrument, but a breakthrough with anything isn't usually really a breakthrough but a long, slow process towards advancement. Regardless, if I start playing more and with more FOCUS on learning new things and not just noodling on 7th chords and the pentatonic, I can definitely get better.

Still, I can't shake this feeling of being something at a loss with what I'll do with myself. I'd really like to turn it into a period of growth and productivity, I'd like this whole summer to be like that. Things to do, start writing my own material, stand up, sketch, etc, learn new monologues, become more athletic, get in better shape, start taking dance/movement, and get more limbre. I think the "get in shape" part is particularly significant, for my career and overall well being. It's been kind of on my "to do" list for a while though, and I haven't made significant strides yet. Maybe this will be my summer! Here's hoping.

---

A poem from when I wrote poems.

My oatmeal is screaming in pleasure

As I sprinkle brown sugar and raisins

Across its porous and mushy surface

Did my oatmeal experience orgasm?

What biological excuse could exist for this?

Does oatmeal need motivation to reproduce?

Or is its pleasure purely arbitrary?

But now the oatmeal is screaming in terror,

When I scoop its flesh into my mouth,

I had no idea it could feel pain,

I suppose I should have figured

When it ejaculated into my OJ.